I�m still trying to heal from The Black Plague. I�ve officially been coughing like a lifetime smoker for two weeks now. I remained vice-free until Saturday night, and that ain�t bad.

Now, I continue to feel fine, but I�ve graduated to the coughing-cool-stuff-up phase. Lovely, green phlegm. Feels so good when you spit it out your car window.

You want me.

Since I�m still coughing, I�m still drugged up. I�ve been on daytime cough for a week, and have been doing a shot of the Nyquil cough every night. It�s pretty much a hazy shade of winter in Jamie�s world, and I can tell by some of the retarded conversations I�ve been having lately. Here are some actual snippets. (No, the Someone Else is not the same person in every conversation. Not that it matters.)

Me: �Would you rather eat a worm or run across the street naked?�

Someone Else: �Run across the street naked, I guess.�

Me: �Oh. Okay.�

Someone Else: �Wait. What street?�

Me: �Hmm. U.S. 1, right in front of my house.�

Someone Else: �What kind of worm?�

Me: �An earthworm. About three inches long.�

Someone Else: �An earthworm! All these questions! What is WRONG with you?!�

Me: �Drugs, man.�

Me: �WHAT?�

Someone Else: �What, what?�

Me: �What was that look?�

Someone Else: �What look?�

Me: �You had a look.�

Someone Else: �I�m full of looks.�

Me: �I�m full of words.�

Short pause.

Someone Else: �You have only one speed, don�t you? And it�s just GO, isn�t it?�

Me: �Pretty much.�

Someone Else: �Damn.�

Me: �So, you�ll be fishing for what, three or four days?�

Someone Else: �Yeah, until it gets windy.�

Me: �Okay.�

Someone Else: �Do you want me to bring you back a fish?�

Me: �Dead or alive?�

(Long pause.)

Someone Else: �Um, dead, of course.�

Me: �Oh. Okay, then.�