Prepare . . . for total domination.
Latest Entry Older Entries
1.21.02
Karate Kid I'm Not
Friday, 7:30 p.m. I limp - yes, LIMP - in the door after a tough Tae Kwon Do sparring practice. Neal is just getting out of the shower, so I head into the bathroom to objectify him for a while.

Neal: "Oh jeez. What the hell happened to you? And your leg? And your hand?"

Me: "Let's put it this way. Can YOU say you've sparred with a large man named 'Thor'?"

Neal: "Hmmm. Well, actually, yes. I had a co-worker named Thor, and we used to spar all the time."

Me: "Damn it! That was going to be so fucking cool, until you rained on my parade! Damn you and all your crazy experiences!"

Neal: "Sorry."

Me: "That's okay."

Seriously, people. Thor. The instructor was all like, "Go easy on her," and I was all, "Why don't you tell ME to go easy on HIM?" and then three kicks and two punches later, I regretted every word of smack talk that's ever escaped my mouth because DAMN, that shit hurt. I'm not sure what exactly happened to my leg, but I've been sporting a supersexy gimpy limp for three days now. The yucky purple bruise on my left knuckles, I remember. That's when Thor went to punch me in the chest pad, and instead of just taking the punch, which would have been much less painful, I went to block and so he punched my hand, smashing it against my pad, which is approximately as soft and cushy as drywall.

Damn me and my lightning-quick reflexes!

I haven't written in a while, because there's been nothing interesting to write. I'm very much not one of those people who are good at writing about stuff when things aren't great. I'm all about denial paired with sarcastic humor, you know? Not to mention, there are very few journals I'll continue to read while they're whining about their awful lives.

So I'll just say that work was so busy last week that I barely had time to breathe, and Neal and I are working through a tough time right now, and leave it at that. Wait, one more thing - don't worry about Neal and me, you guys. When I say "working through," I mean it. It's going to take time, but we'll be spectacular soon.

I promise.

The Realm of Monkey Love
chatty chat about news and such
buy stuff; feed poor kids